Not the answers I was looking for

Wednesday I took my boy in for his annual check-up. I had a few concerns for the doctor, but in particular I wanted to discuss his behavior. Don't you know the little brat did every thing he could to contradict me!

He didn't say a word to the nurse or to either of the doctors that came in to see him. He pretended to read a book or look at some invisible dot on the floor. The look on his face seemed to say "If I ignore them, they're not really here". And yet here I was telling not one, but two doctors about how he beats up his sister, how he's stubborn and defiant. They probably thought I was the crazy one!

Thank you very much Dude for making me look like an ass of a mom blowing things out of proportion!

The answers I got from the doctor wasn't what I was hoping for.

I am not trying to label my son, nor do I want him on any medication, unless it is absolutely necessary. I was seeking advice on how to handle him on those days where I am ready to pull my hair out! It's not every day that he cuts up, but it's more often than I care to admit.

I explained that we have taken privileges as well as rewarded good behavior. When those don't work, off to the rug in the kitchen he goes for a time out.

What the doctor told me?

Keep talking to him and keep doing what you're doing. He starts school at the end of the month and if he is still like this come October, come back and we'll talk about it some more.

Obviously doing what I'm doing isn't working!!! Thank you very much Dr. T for a lack of advice!

Maybe I'm expecting too much too fast. Yes I have been doing the previously mentioned punishments/rewards all damn summer with no change. But in the past few weeks since I wrote the first post about this, I have changed a few things. Sometimes it works, but not every time.

Only time will tell I suppose. But while I'm at it, I might as well throw out a thank you very much to Father Time. He's not always my BFF either!

hosted by Kmama

*For anyone who wants to leave some advice - I read and take to heart every word you say. But please keep in mind that we have had this same doctor since our daughter was born almost 9 years ago. He was our saving grace when our daughter was suffering from the worst of her asthma. We trust him and have a great relationship with him. This is the man that sees my mom or MIL in public and asks them how the kids are.

I love my son to death! I believe he was given to us to teach me the value of patience and creative thinking. I am going with the benefit of the doubt that time will heal. My son does not embrace change, but hopefully when school starts for him, things will fall into place. If not, then we will proceed to the next step.*


Tracie said...

I'm the LAST person in the world you'd want parenting advice from. All I know is that boys can be very, very difficult. Mine are anyway.

Leah said...

I have a very untraditional idea for you to try... just hear me out :) some background is this is advice I heard from my dad who is a public school educator and works with a variety of kids as an environmental educator. He calls kids who are add (etc) as having 'rapid fire thoughts.' He hates drs labeling kids as add/adhd/putting them on meds. His advice he tells everybody with hyper kids is to cut them from gluten (wheat) and caisen (dairy). There are some chemicals in both (natural occuring) that make some kids extra hyper. There is a book he recommends - not sure what its called but it reinforces this, suggests kid friendly foods etc. Good luck!

Kmama said...

Kids *always* try to contradict you in the doctor's office. It's like some unwritten rule. If they are on their death bed at home, they will run around and smile at the doctor's office. So frustrating.

I'm sorry you didn't get the answers you were hoping for...maybe school will be good for him? A good routine?

Thanks for linking up!

Just Me said...

I learned a LONG time ago that kids will make liars out of us all the time. I think they do it on purpose.

Rachel said...

So true how kids can totally make us look bad in the doctor's office!

Parenting is hard work. No advice, just praying that you find the solution that works for your family.

I know it's frustrating to have a doctor say "wait and see", but maybe he's of the same opinion you are - that this might be a phase that resolves itself in time and with a change of scenery! :)

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