I am that mom, screaming at her kid, who looks like she can't hold anything together.
Unless it's the pool or the park where there's lots of room and it's something they want to do, I dread going anywhere. I'm at the end of my rope and I don't know what to do.
My son is 4, almost 5, and for the longest time, I stood by my son's side and defended him. When comments were made, in his presence I might add, about how he's going to be a handful in school because he's trouble, I defended him. That is my child. How dare you say such things! Not only to me, but to him!
But now things have changed. I still don't consider him a "bad" kid. He can be the sweetest, most loving little boy there is. But when he's not, it's hell! I am constantly telling his sister to be nicer to him. But can you really blame her? Would you be nice to someone who continually hurts you - physically and mentally? Would you be nice to someone who always followed you into your room only to scatter your toys about the room?
I get that this is sibling rivalry. I have a brother. I know all about that, believe me! The misbehaving that my son does is every fucking day! I tell him to leave his sister alone and 10 minutes later he's swinging something else at her head. And yes, there are consequences for his actions. I can't just ask him to stop because that shit just doesn't work! It has to be something that makes me feel guilty as hell. Taking toys, time outs, sometimes a spanking.
The time outs are the worst. I have to physically sit him on the rug in the kitchen and then move everything out of the way. If I don't, there's a good chance the stool will end up across the room, the rug gets thrown, cabinets doors get banged. If he doesn't destroy the kitchen, he will hurt himself! He has done both already.
Every day. Everything is every day! Asking him to do something is just as bad as asking him to NOT do something. There's always an excuse. I want him to clean up his toys. He has to pee. I want him to come inside because it's raining. He has "just one thing" he has to do.
I've tried explaining his behavior to my husband and even our pediatrician. The response I get is always to same. He's a boy. Be patient and be persistent. Well dammit, I am, but still, nothing changes! Nothing! Nobody's here with me all day. Everyone seems to think I am blowing the Dr. Jekyl/Mr. Hyde behavior out of proportion. Boys willl be boys, I agree, but I think that's cop out. You can't dismiss behavior that is causing me to almost rip my hair out every night. Or become an alcoholic.
They can think what they want, but it only pisses me off further. When the hell is someone going to realize that I am at the end of my rope? I want to go out to eat with my family and have a good time. I want to go shopping with my kids and have fun.
I'm tired of being stressed every fucking night over the actions of 1 child.