Fingers and a tight squeeze

Bumper stickers
The husband and I have had quite a few, shall we say, discussions about stickers on the car. In the end, I won. I always win. Or at least I think so.

I only put 2 on the back window. And they're small. Being a Pittsburgh girl who bleeds black and gold, naturally those stickers are for the Steelers and the Penguins.

Or so I thought.

Today I realized that those stickers must be some sort of beacon calling all dumbass drivers to my vicinity. I swear I crossed paths with every dumbass driver in the tri-state area today. But the worst was the idiot who ran me off the road.

Yes, you read that right. I think some poor soul has my tire marks in their yard now.

I just picked the midgets up from school and we were on our way to get the husband from work. To avoid the over abundance of unnecessary stop lights and traffic, I took the back streets. One of these streets is not very long, but it is narrow. Two cars can fit, but it's tight.

I'm halfway down when this fool in his pick-up whips around the corner at the bottom. I stop because I can't move until he does. He stops because he can't move until I do. I sure as shit wasn't backing up that narrow street. So there I sat. He must have looked in every direction but out the front windshield and fiddled with every gadget before he finally stared me down.

I continued to sit. He had more room to maneuver than I did anyway. I finally backed up a bit so I could move my car over for him. There may or may not have been a few flip-offs on my part in that process.

Road rage

No sooner do I put the car in drive to move closer to the side does he start to barrel up the road. The fucker came within inches of my car. Had I not driven into some person's yard, I would have been missing a headlight. If not more.

As if simultaneously scaring the shit out of me and pissing me off wasn't enough, he thinks it's a good idea to stop right next to me, roll down his window, and give me a good "Fuck you". My Irish temper is overflowing by this point, so naturally, I gave him one back.

Let's just hope the midgets don't go to school tomorrow and tell all their friends "Fuck you"! In my defense he said it first!


Welcome To Mommyland said...

That is hilarious.
Never mess with an irish lass - i'm one too!

Oka said...

weird, I had a very similar day with drivers yesterday. There was one point i n less than 2 minutes I had four cars merge onto me as if I wasn't there.

Kimberly said...

Hell hath no fury like an Irish chick! Once some guy was driving behind me and I came to an intersection. I had to stop in the middle cause some dack made a left turn in front of me. The dude behind me started honking and flipping me off so when I met him at the stop sign I rolled my window down, honked and yelled fuck off asshole. He was so pissed...and I felt better ;)

Kmama said...

What an idiot. I hate other drivers. Seriously hate them. I get so frustrated with them. Last night, some idiot was driving 25 in a 55 mph zone. I was about to blow up when he finally turned.

Day 2 Day Living said...

This is the exact reason that I HATE to drive. I have to drive an hour to and from work. I swear as soon as I walk out to my car some kind of national alarm goes off for all idiots to hit the road and get in my way.

Brandy@YDK said...

wow - what a mess.

Babes Mami said...

I am convinced I have a target on my car or something when I'm out!

Sandra said...

totally on your side! I love the visual of you looking all around, as though to say: "I don't see you I don't see you!"

Frugal Vicki said...

I'm with you! And what is with freaking drivers lately? Apparently it has become the norm to cross four lanes of traffic no matter how close cars are.